Karleen Savage on Building Connected and Peaceful Families
In this powerful and eye-opening episode, Carlene Savage—conflict resolution expert, crisis negotiator, and mom of six—shares her unconventional journey into the world of hostage negotiation and how it transformed her understanding of conflict, communication, and connection.
Although she hasn’t participated in a live hostage scenario, Carlene is certified alongside professionals in counterterrorism, SWAT, and the FBI. Her path into crisis and conflict resolution came from a deeply personal place: trying to navigate the challenges of family life, including parenting through trauma and supporting a spouse with a brain injury.
Carlene breaks down "The Savage Theory of Resolution", a trademarked framework based on five powerful tools used by hostage, crisis, and mediation professionals. These tools have a remarkable success rate (60–90%) and—more importantly—are completely transferable to everyday family life and relationships.
Key Takeaways:
Conflict isn't bad—it’s information. Learning how to decode our own triggers is the beginning of mastering conflict at home.
Curiosity is essential. Especially in relationships where we think we know our spouse or children, staying curious keeps connection alive.
Parenting is a high-stakes negotiation. Unlike crisis professionals, parents don’t have a support team or debrief resources—but we can learn their tools.
The 5 Tools in the Savage Theory of Resolution (briefly mentioned):
Curiosity in conflict – becoming an exceptional learner, not a fixer or judge.
(Remaining four tools are teased—listen in to hear more!)
You can course correct. When you blow it, own it, reset, and try again. It’s part of the process.
Whether you're dealing with daily parenting stress or deeper relational struggles, this episode offers hope and practical tools to transform the way you engage in conflict—starting with yourself.
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